things ive decided

I want to work in the porn industry. After the amount of times I have said this in Meanie Heart I think I will do it after I find a doctor. I'm okay with dating ever, after the length I spent waiting to get fixed I want to fuck twenty three thousand woman. #Howardstern I don't know why that wouldn't be possible once I don't have to sleep anymore and these symptoms are gone. Ghosts whatever it needs to go so I can get on with my life. I need to get back to film and I've documented my psychosis and now just want a fix and to get onto the next thing. My least concern is the biting hand thing I'm sure it will go away. I have ti get to a doctor to get to the next thing. I want to not live in a place in Ny,ny that is career death But it's not my fault I'm ill and want to return to film buy got ill and got seperated from my adopted family. I lost Mark Agerholm on the way but that just shows how this little nemo on hbo thing took over my life I went off my pill and missed Gunnar's death and Richard Lindwall's and these people were forefathers to me in life. Being in a mode like a little kid probably has something to do with it. And I can't stand this place we are at but fucking it'll be like a year before these people get around to me in the housing lottery. I will just hide and watch #Awkward