Me- meanie heart comes up and it's devil's night

I was murdered by my schizophrenia in forecastmszy.blogspot.com i hid the t.v. show from anns but i presume she's behind it so i put my trust into it. I put all my money into it. I think at one point they came to take me out as a member of Thee Temple ov Psychik Youth and are from the Republican party in forecastmazy.blogspot.com this was in the time of Farenheight 9/11 a movie i presume everybody lives by, there was no black president and it seemed with Bush as president there never would be. My life like all was built on credit i had 750 and no problem paying my rent, my decade in hell's kitchen was to begin. Back to present timeline, worthless voices surround me physical Brc people symbols of my stolen Adderall people living and working for the transitional housing I watch in the flesh people come in again and the voices talk to me you know they go away if i ignore them but i still think they owe me a career i don't like people with voices this is something that will stay true with me it's an anna day on little nemo on hbo they keep calling me fame keeps calling me i will make it there one way or another i did not go to film school to fucking see people at the Brc everytime i go to sleep i'm in trauma the voices just ask me about the future but they don't have a plan for it sometimes i just talk to my deas uncle for help in this little nemo on hbo world. The Anniversary - Designing a Nervous Breakdown. The album remains beyond the genuine artwork i made to caitlin. I don't really care why i made the artwork, i logged this, but more easily if you place my forecastmazy.blogspot.com faith in Harvey Weinstein in AdHd meeting schizophrenia you can easily document your condition and make myspace.com/williamsburgskittles I don't need to remember the last thing i did to direct. forecastmazy.blogspot.com took anna and left me like the crow always remembering her but never seeing Shelly until the cemetary or once i've redeemed myself in fame. If I can only make artwork about me because I have a condition that is blocking my creativity then I will just continue to do this in little nemo on hbo. Where youtube.com/caitlinrodrigue1214 is me trying to in chaos magick using my body as a transmitter place my energy back in the net from all the physical artwork i made in Williamsburg , Brooklyn it is also the last time i can deny something is wrong and I'd have to acknowledge all of this and total what i've done under the word republican. me, fate calls me beyond cartoon network which is all the people in the shelter watch which now is a channel called Teen Titans!Go i'm not sure why they never made a Simpsons channel, each person represents failure in this place, it's a place of quicksand and death like in Beetlejuice with the sandworms that eat you, if you don't plauge and nag your caseworker they will never get you housing. The housing is a regular apartment just paid for by the state. Chuck Schumer pays for all of this. There were days i couldn't even read about Michael Bloomberg the way my condition is in 2009 even an era without the internet. These are times where i die, but i think i'm on a t.v. show and have yet to guess this is all about psych and i simply need to face it. I think i'm on the street running from my father who seeing was my WORST nightmare in life at livejournal.com/~forecastmazy I would rather die than see Pete. Now producers were in my mind and betraying my femminism at Hbo, mommy love and Puertican Pride in the way that an ethnically spanish boy who's white inside raised in Fairfield, Connecticut by Fairfield Highschool hates his father. When my mother unjustly went to jail for a year at 13 and my worst nightmare happened and i had to live with Pete I lived a world of war on Judd street in Fairfield, Connecticut with my spiritual and living enemy my biological father and there was no other choice or i'd be out of fairfield. Because Fairfield High School monitors closely where their students live, no outsiders in our white community. And i'm sorry to me if i don't explain this right but cartoon network is blasting really bad cartoons and I have a Bfa so let me say this shit frails to Ren and Stimpy (where is a channel that plays Pete and Pete). My father basically told me my mother and i live like niggers and i was done talking to him, it felt like life went backwards, i was at the home before the divorce, my grandparents were there and my enemy whk used to beat my imprisoned mother was across the hall and i was to sleep anext the bed i refused to sleep on where my mother used to cry on the floor witg my two cats, my only family. After my father choked me I went to New York to get a knife incase he came at me again since my uncle wouldn't kill him (there were these Puerto Ricans called uncles beyond the barrior of Fairfield in a thing called Bridgeport which housed alot of black and poor people my mother and i ran away from and ignored since i don't believe in biological families) I erased these events in my novels Sophmoric Dreams, Running Down a Dream and Rotten Apples creating a world of my character Mike just living in this magic combo home of 8 Berrylane Ct and 70 Crane street on the Crane Street plot). This used to be really important to me as forecastmazy.livejournal.com i mean I really loved Crane Street where these art school practice novels made of age 13 girlfriend notes took place. This was the home i departed when my mother went to jail. The home as a 13 year old latchkey kid i had all my movie channels ready (my mother's payment for film school at 13) and was ready to buy in the future. .i remember mourning this home and was sure Pete had voodoo in that Judd Street home you see in the Windowsil video on youtube.com/forecastmazyfilms Sorry got distracted again, the people who don't help me move for an absurd amount of time came by again. A walkie-talkie voice. I never went through a metal detector before living in the shelter people die in before they get housing (okay only-one fatality but still). This would never have happened if Theodore Mapes were alive. But then you'd be watching Occupy Fashion practicing pua and not reading this and i would have my dental shit done already. This house on Judd street in The Arcade Fire - Windowsill i had erased with my School of Visual Arts freshmen year novels my first summer in 215 East 23Rd street apt.2223a1 ny, ny 10010 (a place if the world ever wants to give me a gift let me live there forever). This was literal and the trauma memory and belief that Pete's voodoo magic could touch me was gone. The piece of shit was finally dead to me. Of course i never expected to see him again - unless it was like on t.v. like John Lennon and his dad the astranged meeting- on my fame- forecastmazy.blogspot.com - i think at 23 that's why i'm going to see Pete, an awkward meeting and i even see my Grandmother Christine Mastronardi who only did weird shit in mt childhood like tell me my mother was shit for being Puerto Rican and when we left the home on the big fight in 1996 right before 6th grade that led to divorce, as my mother ran to her car and my father kicks both spicd out screaming and looking very mentally ill, to STAY with grandma, with grandma racist. But this was the run for freedom from Judd street and that house in Windowsill youtube.com/forecastmazyfilms and i ran with mommy from the daily hell of living in fear of my father on Judd Street, from my mother's tears and wounds to her car and towards my future happy home sleeping in the living room of the on bedroom apartment of 6 Knapps Park Ln in Fairfield, C.t. which i requested to take as my room so i could watch t.v. it was a big year for Absolutely Fabulous and where i'd start masturbating in the shower. .i'm glad to share all of this with you theoccupyfashion.blogspot.com audience before my adderall script is stolen from me by the Brc and the nurse thatcher that works here and lead me on my current doctor find search for my decade old medication (before i found adderall i didn't know the word focus was real, i didn't know sociality existed, i thought everyone had the situation that reading words never added to knowledge in memory, i never could complete my own art projects, never got an A in school, never passed a test with memory, thought everyone hated high school, thought everyone had the option of being a criminal or seeing if this school thing worked out-) But I had anna in forecastmazy.diaryland.com who before schizophrenia i plannes on marrying, before this little nemo on Hbo world, she was my soulmate and girlfriend for 4 years. She was my consort in hook-ups she was my adviser in girls I liked at The School of Visual Arts. She was my anna and the only person in life i have ever liked. I never let people get close to me when this mattered because i trust noone. I can only operate in a Belmont and Merteuil relationship. A world like Cruel Intentions was possible before Little Nemo on Hbo. I had chosen Hell's Kitchen for her but nothing became as it was meant to be at 23.