It's another Meanie Heart thing on the ghosts and spinning in circles this time to enduce it whatever they are they don't have a deep understand maybe they are my own intellect looking back at me, this would be so much easier to explain if i had a laptop i can't take the typos from this shit. I didn't know what was going on in Brooklyn as-seen in youtube.com/forecastmazyfilms on the ghosts clip that's in my Williamsburg , Brooklyn apartment even though it's Bushwick. I think of fighting the conditions like being in the hipster military and write like blood font on the wall with markers each item that helps the headaches and fixes me. I count time on my medication and i go back on even though they scare me off at one point. It's fighting the world of little nemo on Hbo head on that creates my future a future and the lesson of forecastmazy.blogspot.com this is season:1 and all at the School of Visual Arts but i sleep off my medication as strategy to graduate and document when i'm rested this in my Brooklyn apartment 40s trashed logged on silvertiles.blogspot.com so even if i don't live in Williamsburg , Brooklym i consider myself living at 47 metroplitian avenue Williamsburg , Brooklyn permanently where i land after youtube.com/forecastmazyfilms and i haven't gotten into it but maybe this whole thing is The Visual Axis. Anna named this, at a lunch in forecastmazy.diaryland.com in the apartment in the east village we decided to get married. This is like circa 2006 and The Sopranos are still on. Little Nemo on Hbo doesn't yet exist and i have yet to come up with the idea of a Little Nemo movie series as the new The Craft but with real esoteric magick and Solomon talismans. I have yet to purchase these items for study (and incase they work like in forecastmazy.diaryland.com) i have yet to live in the year i think my friends are documenting me, the silver tiles. I have yet to have to call myself Kade as mt subcharacter to Christopher Mastronardi and have a problem writing my screenplays and enacting my plan. It's 2015- and i'm at a shelter i'm ready to ditch to just live on the panhandling train situation and buy caffiene pills and never sleep. I'm just dieing and aging here sleeping and hiding from the fear i have to face if the cops play illegal numbers week on panhandlers. I think it's just some weeks are Deblasio's plaim clothes cops week considering how i was stopped for a cars swipe asking. This is panhandling in the court world and i'm not even sure if this is a misdemeanee i think it's a violatiom not that this matters. I have a record from being homeless from running from my father's home at the end of forecastmazy.blogspot.com after I lose my Brooklyn apartment. I get into Mfa Pete signs a loan and i'm about to go, S.v.a. pushes forward the date of starting, last second back-listed for a year possibility in a letter. The headaches are grinding like in The Maxx and my stomach feels likw knives are cutting through it. On Adderall I have the ability to move my body, feel and decide what to feel. My intellect feels blocked and i can only feel exterior. I get anxiety and feel like a child afront people. These are my symptoms at Hart Street in Brooklyn I'm showing the outside of me on my pill off-i can't even count it as me the pain washes over me and i feel like i'm in 7th grade, i'm about as smart as i was then in that mode, i go numb, and time inside myself as a function stops. My psyche has been like this since 2007, if i can't find a psychiatrist for my Adderall script before i run out time will stop until i get the medication again. That's essentially when i'll see you-if i write before then and from then it's from Welbutrin land or whatever to keep up. Unless I find something like ritalin or some alternate to my medication. I enjoyed starting to explain little nemo on Hbo and my life's work/art which if i don't blog and explain 7 years of work i will appear like a Sephoras version of a Bling Ring thief in youtube.com/caitlinrodriguez1214 The adderall adds up and as it does the Ghosts lead me to the conclusio of webMD and AdHd. It took quite a while to find the right situation to get out of the republican party that i thought held me hostage since 23. DidvI mention i can't hear or feel music without Adderall, that without everything feels muffled and dry? The Brc is an excellent diagnoser since all these people have seen is me bite my hand once. That's a convulsion, medications fix this. I didn't tell nurse tatcher of any of my internals (such a cute name for the literal that's abouy to be caused). I regret living here, they fucking called my private doctor also they diagnosis being up at 1am. They have people here-one woman-that hasn't showered in the 4 months i've been here. You can smell her and her floor picked cigarettes four floors up. I walked to Pier84 to smoke a cigarettw before i quit to disassociate from any of these people even breathing near me. It's 2015 and my mind's in a tunnel. I remember Teddy calling me Buddy, my Buddy doll from the retarded 20 years i had of life before Adderall, my mother and we're back to my Lady Gaga iPod. Ilod curtousey of the Best Buy donation bin. If you could please send me your old iPod with music on it i'd be remiss in you saving me from going to jail for taking recycled phones from Best Buy which is probably labeled by the NyPd asa phone scheme - just txt 2039098766 pleeeeease and i'll give you my address. You will be saving Occupy Fashion. So me- i'm still doing air movements to seal the fucking chaos magic that i doubt will keep me out of jail or institutions which is the reason for the magick at some base level, both of which i don't acknowledge as apart of my life. If you want to know little nemo on hbo is a journey to Adderall, picking my life up and finding a way to tell a doctor of my symptoms. I found a website that explained from another schizophrenic that once they give you the pill all the bullshit symptoms go away. So that encourages my current era of life and writing. me-just eventually i couldn't ignore all these symptoms. And there's no way to ignore our life pause from youtube.com/forecastmazyfilms as a filmmaker. Everyday that this goes further where.i have to live or log by symptoms apart of my inner editor dies. Fco has advanced from 6.1 and i've waited until now to question the Little Nemo on Hbo concept of us as the main star of a Hbo reality t.v. show. But as amnesia gets me in 2015 as i respond to a mason (i pray to these people and believe they speak to me in ghost form) i have to admit i want to scream caitlinrodriguezhusband.blogspot.com has taken our life (and if you click on the profile you'll see the whole of my psychosis as a Democrat labeled Republican and my journey down through the tea cup of leading the tea party to e-maim forecastmazy@gmail.com If you ever want to e-mail me use christophermastronardi@gmail.com Save Point