Me-promotionBacktoTheFutureMonth

Which Back to The Future day also happens to be Anna's birthday. Me-I did some promotion so that I could have some form of audience. I realize all of this writing may be for the future when I have fcp again and want to turn Little nemo on Hbo into a movie. Slash I can't count my life waiting for teeth. I'm writing on our Android and I pray I get the doctor and don't run out of Adderall. The most affecting us is our record from years ago when we thought Harvey Weinstein wanted us to get caught stealing. And the laptop we stole after ours got stolen when we thought we had to, to make artwork for The Weinstein Company the difference being my medication led me to figure out even the Ghosts I talked to are symptoms which is the closest thing I will acknowledge this as/I think you can talk to ghosts by writing to the dead (which for all I know is not comnon in a Christian nation). Me-it's distracting the hell I live in this trasitional wait for housing I mean for fucks sake the wait is absurd the people don't shower and this wait was supposed to be alot quicker. I sometimes can't handle that as I try to save our career I have to worry if I locked our locker that an instant thief is waiting to go along and take. )Our job at Occupy Wallstreet saved us and taught us how to Occupy with medicaide and I have a problem because I have a memory problem that has canceled out my acting ability. Me-it feels like my mind is clogged. I can't even screenwrite right now it's like I literally cannot describe this fog it's the kind of thing you go to the Energency room for because you forget if your wallet is in your pocket unless you put it there all the time. Without Adderall the pain inbetween ass and crotch inner area feels like there are knives attacking me when I stay still, I am shaky inside in talking to people and have some weird anxiety and feel like I downloaded little kid. I don't feel like a man me and only a psychiatrist can fix it. I realized all this at the West Park church on the upper west side where our 2 years there I learned survival in the Occupy through homeless world is your social security and birth certificate. I almost lose these all the time, might not be confident enough literally inside to go through the steps to get them again/could lose my medicaide from that/not get housing/; not get out of this awful place. My disease if schizophrenia since my new doctor will diagnosis this involves a psychosis of once thinkinh I was talking to my School of Visual Arts friends and Hbo via implant chio through talking out loud and a constant tiredness that makes even lifting my phone feel strainning which Adderall takes away half the symptoms. I made it from internal attack Series 7 the movie at art school T.v. to (in Psychosis) thr voicrs /anything I have ever talked to being ghosts. Me-I'm not willing to admit that we heard ANYTHING now but fear I'm being rigged because of circumstance to run out of Adderall and won't be able to type this story when I feel secure in sharing this/by then it's too late and I'm illiterate. Me-I need a stronger medication since it only fixes half of the symptoms. Me-my main problem is Excessive Daytime Sleepiness and does not feel like normal tired. Me-to use our Bfa for anything from the School of Visual Arts we'll need a stronger pill and doc diagnosis I can't stay still at a computer, and when I attempt it feels like their are knives inside my leg jabbing the sharpest edge at my crotch again and again and again. So editing is kind of -on pause in learning. And really we graduated for directing but I don't know how well I'd do with the level of anxiety I have when I speak to people. Time feels like it's on pause which is why I made the School of Visual Arts church of Silver Tiles calender which I have on pause at 2055/8 (to start time). And 8 means cocaine because I always thought and think I'm representing Williamsburg , Brooklyn in the artwork of the T.v. show that's supposed ti be a high adrenalin show where I could go to jail if I make the wrong move but have to steal the products or my mind dies. But jail records they din't cancel because I thought I was on Hbo with Harvey Weinstein although it was years ago so in my eyes it's gone and either way I have to get a job and wouldn't steal from work/:' -( am really done stealing. Me-sometimes I talk to my grandfather out loud to help me thus Season:5 where I think you can talk to any dead person by just talking to them. But I am universalist. Me-i can't imagine one of these missing and any of our artwork ever making any sense. Me-I want to move and don't like to write about poverty. Me-I have done something incredible and linking a journey through psychosis on-set and the world off our medication through the word Republican. Me-dream president Hillary Clinton may win Me-I can't handle the amount of things our hand biting condition has been but I can see why I would never mention this to a person. But it's hard to hide and my artwork only makes sense through being exactly honest. I have like a decade of psychosis almost saved in blogs and videos on the net. Me-at this point biting myself on Facebook is to log the condition that took my teeth at the West Park Church. Me- it was supposed to be in a scene that was for chaos magic and the south to get to the next thing. Like to pray a magic force got me my pill and I knew it was me but at the church I had enough Adderall to come to. Me-Teddy you saved my life. Rip Theodore Mapes see you in lights wherever you are. I used to do chaos magic that Season in the church while Occupy Wallstreet went on and the Republican party told me not to make friends. So the word Republican stole from 2007-2015 in my life and all the while painful internal 24/7 conditions I beared which made me not want to speak to people. And I need my teeth fixed , Me- alot of shit I'd like to get on this blog so we have it documented so our artwork makes sense. I promoted today on Lena Dunham's shit and just want somebody to watch my artworm knowing what it is. The idea of Little nemo on Hbo I think could become real. And don't see why there isn't Hbo art school./I guess Ifc may be the closest we'll get this era. Me-we began this project in another decade but time won't move and I can only think on Adderall so I need our like life conclusions uo here because it could be 2 years who knows:before we get another doctor since some waits are like 3 months long. Me-I hate the people in transitional housing. The need to log all this is urgent, I'm clear now and it's horrible for the lights to get turned off now. Since I want to log the little nemo on Hbo footage eras/incase Reuben ever reads this/I don't know when I want to tell him/ Me- a thought literally just disappeares like I literally have a condition that I cannot remember the last thing I did. Then I realized it was almost 10 years we're Little Nemo in Hbo and I thought this shit would just go away and my end of the deal would be losing my friends because of the art and that would be it, but I guess shit like this doesn't just go away. It's hard to come back from a art tv show where you think your in the Hbo hipster military and can never stop switching clothes to beat the zombie inside; I can't face showering in the basement of the church with Teddy was not apart of an art Tv show. Me-I've gotten to thr point of thinking talking to anything is as absurd as the voodoo death curse I put on my friends and myself (but if the chaos magic works shouldn't I have a job ny now) Some of the blogs are soooooo hard to read because I think of people like Caitlin reading this shit (but it's in part creative I mean she was in the Fairfield, Connecticut novel and it's in all honor to her)and besides I've made it so I can never take back a blog by losing old account passwords so everything stays logged in it's prosterity, and it all had to really be explained (but in reality little nemo on Hbo is a show that could exist directed by Lena Dunham(. I don't see why not since everybody must have liked Tiny Furniture (I presume everyone lives by Hbo's Girls) and like I should explain a doctor just needs to give me a pill and screenwriting returns,ghosts gone,done! Like I'm not harmful schizophrenic I'm overgrown AdHd that made a bad guess on what's going on. But I swear one day in art school schizophrenia struck and I never braved it to the doctor. I just didn't know that it's a pill and you don't have to go away or anything and the doctor doesn't tell anyone. I just had another anxiety attack about finding a doctor which comes in scared feeling breaths. And off Adderall I can barely move have the pain symptoms ghosts blah blah and can't move my body and sleep all day in a panic attack. Me-I can't admitt what the ghosts are there's too much shame in hearing voices. And despite sleeping 20 hours being an Emergency for me to get to a doctor I don't know when I will find this stable doctor. And it's fucking not fair since I can't work or function but it feels like until I find a doctor to wake me up I'll be schizophrenic beauty. Also I don't like that word since I don't feel I relate to schizophrenic people. I only have mild symptoms of sometimes hearing a noise. I don't hear full on voices and have my problem's biggest issue being I cannot wake up physically and coffee is not affective in waking me uo but I will try it anyway, but it and redbull even have an underlayer that puts my body to sleep. I guess if Adderall is not enough to wake me up I can't expect coffee to do it. This is a good point to save point my progress.